Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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