Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Randomize
