Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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