Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
