who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
