How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
