its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize
