youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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