Slut skills are useful in every country.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
