thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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