Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
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