I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
