Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
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