well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
