they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
