: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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