stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
