Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
