I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
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