why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Just puked most of my soul out..
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