Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
Randomize
