dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
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