Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize
