We should be called the Road Head Warriors
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
