I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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