needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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