I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
