is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize