I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
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