I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
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