I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize