Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
