Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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