But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
