Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
