Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
i wish my penis had a tongue
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Randomize