I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
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