chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Randomize
