Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
