I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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