420 ftw
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
