I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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