i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
