i jhust puked up my retainher.
oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
