Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Randomize
