I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
