Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
