She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
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