ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
