im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
