oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
